I very rarely remember my dreams.

Come 06:00 my eyes instantly open upon a brand new day, my brain fresh and uncluttered with meaningless experiences I may have collected during my virtual peregrinations through the shadows of night. Said brain then kicks in approx. one hour and 27 minutes later, but that’s another story altogether..

So imagine my surprise when I sat up in bed yesterday and the faint imprint of a tenebrous recollection wavered through my mind: I could still catch the glimpse of…a rabbit. A big white bl**dy bunny!

My nocturnal companion could have been a fire-spitting dragon or a cunning leprechaun. Or maybe even a loosely-clad wench. But for once that I was actually able to reminisce SOMETHING (let alone ANYTHING), it was not to be: a rabbit it was.

“Must be a symbol”, I thought, “must mean something totally emblematic; a sign, a signal sent to me from the profoundness of my subconscious”.

So I went and looked it up:

“To see a rabbit in your dream, signifies luck, magical power, and success. You have a positive outlook on life. Alternatively, rabbits symbolize abundance, warmth, fertility and sexual activity.”

Golly! “Magical power“! I knew it! And that in conjunction with “sexual activity“?!? Hey, wow!!!! But as DBW was brushing her teeth at that very moment, I continued my research..

And then I saw it: had the fluffy-one been hopping around? Even just a little bit? On one leg, maybe? Because if it had then:

“To see rabbits hopping, signifies fertility and that children will bring you much joy.”

Bugger: it was a fable after all!!!

My daughter is a genius!

Without telling anyone, and while we were convinced she was shut away in her room doing her homework. she was busy developing a vaccine for Swine Flu!

Unfortunately, as indeed she hadn’t been informed, when Mum discovered the cultures, carefully camouflaged in a McDonalds give-away Coke glass under the budding scientist’s bed, her reaction was only normal: eyebrows were raised, expletives were uttered and, the carefully-engineered microorganisms were flushed down the toilet.

A sad day for bioscience!

So Vic encountered her first taste of the Law today..

After having had lunch in the park she simply and conveniently discarded her empty plastic salad bowl behind a wall (“[..] where a mountain of other garbage had accumulated anyway [..]“).

And was subsequently pounced upon by an (undercover) member of the local police. Who proceeded to admonish her in a patronizing and totally non-educational way before handing her a fine for CHF 50.00.

I believe she’s learned a lesson: she declared that she would NEVER EVER chuck ANYTHING on the floor again and would ALWAYS look for a bin, even if it meant she had to walk a mile.

….then she asked if we would pay her fine….

Ladies and Gentlemen, the Viiiiiiiiiiiic, in concert, liiiiiive from Zurzach:

I’ve been married for nearly 17 19 20 years now, but there is one situation I have NEVER quite managed to handle:

Believe me: as much as I have tried, reaching into the bottomless depths of my superior intellect, I have yet to come up with the ideal answer.

I mean, if the question is asked, it must be for a reason; DBW rarely fishes for compliments.

The obvious replies (and their outcome) are:

You can guess my favorite, but I am seriously running out of body parts…

• 06:00 Wakies
• 06:05 Coffee #1
• 06:10 Start downloading the latest episode of 24 *
• 06:20 Bring Rambo to his day mum
• 06:25 Carry out old paper and cardboard to the side of the road (yes: WE recycle)
• 06:40 Prepare DBW’s coffee
• 06:45 Wake up DBW
• 06:50 Coffee #2
• 06:54 Burn the first 9 episodes of 24 onto a DVD for a colleague
• 06:55 Prepare kids’ Latte Macchiatos and ice teas for lunch **
• 07:00 Shower
• 07:05 Shave
• 07:10 Dress
• 07:15 Make bed
• 07:20 Drive kids to school (exceptional as Vic is currently on crutches)
• 08:00 Drive on to work

Ah, I remember the days when I would be up and out in the space of 15 minutes…. *SIGH!* Don’t you just LOVE emancipation?

* Nope it’s NOT illegal in Switzerland..
** Ok: DBW cooked the kids lunch while I was showering, but that’s kind of normal, no?